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I Hate My Body

NOT!!

I appreciate my body.  It's the shell that  houses my spirit--which is the esence of me.

It is fearfully and wonderfully made declares the psalmist David.

And it is made in the image of God.

It's an amazing machine as it were.

Hearing on TV this morning that the average woman 'hates' her body' 13 times a day made me cringe.

What rot. 

It's come to that has it???

Why do so many women allow the influence of the world standard of beauty to rob them of their joy?

To devote so much thought to the body image????

Ridiculous I say.

Sure, I'd rather I hadn't been born with crooked bottom teeth, or eyes that require spectacles.  I'd prefer to be taller than I am.  And a few other things.

But to obsess-- 13 times a day-- and hate my body?

Ridiculous.

I say, can we even believe that report?

If it is true, then women of the world I say "STOP!!!"

You are allowing your feelings to rob you.
  

DO NOT LET THE WORLD CONFORM YOU TO THEIR IMAGE OF WHAT YOU SHOULD BE.

It is your decision and yours alone.

Reject what others tell you.  

Take your power and use it and make up your own mind.

Begin treasuring the body that houses the essence of you.

Take care of that body.

And most of all, be thankful for the gift of it--because it is truly a gift, designed by a beneficent Creator.

My Word For 2011

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PURSUE

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as in

1. To be engaged in (a vocation or hobby, life)

2.  To proceed along the course of; to  follow

3.To follow after

4. To carry on; continue.

5. To carry further; advance

6. To accomplish

FUN IN TEN

Instead of making resolutions for the new year I resolved to have fun this year. Fun is my byword for 2010. Accompanied by my fun will be beauty--they will go hand in hand. Let fun and beauty reign.

It doesn’t cost a fortune to have a beautiful life. Beautiful things can be had for mere pennies. Some can be had for free.

If you bother to look out a window and take in the vista, there is delight to behold and if you ponder over what you see, wonder may also be part of the experience.

Venture outside and pick a flower or a branch of leaves and bring it into your home. Place it in a clean jelly jar or a favored glass or cup. You do have some fun or lovely glasses and cups don’t you? No? Then remedy that a.s.a.p. If you are going to drink, do it from something that delights your senses. Function does not have to be devoid of beauty and wonderment.

Don’t neglect to beautify the inner person. For out of this inner self springs the fountain of you. Considering what goes in must come out, examine what you are filling yourself with.

Is it that which is lovely, kind, pure, of good report, of praise, of virtue, of mercy, of grace? This goodness will displace whatever makes you ill at ease, causes you discomfort, causes you to distress.

We all live with and must deal with stress. Stress in and of itself is not a bad thing. Dis-tress is the ill, and can make us ill. So if you stress, you are human. If you are distressed you are weighted down, burdened, filled with care.

I love to begin my day with a prayer of thanksgiving, spilling from my heart onto my lips, heavenward--a whisper in God’s ear acknowledging his beneficence. A prayer as simple as breathing--in and out.. Natural--no fancy words or utterances. Just pure, plain and simple. I do not have to cloak my being in words, for God reads my heart. I need not even form my words. He knows me intimately. But he delights in hearing my utterances which are a testament of my belief, of my faith.

A good cup of coffee--or tea, a candle lighted to dispel any darkness or gloom, and music to soothe my soul--all these are good things, a good beginning to prepare oneself for inner beautification. A hefty dose of the Rx for all that ails me--meditating on, reading of God’s word--the Bible--which is his revelation of himself, his promises, his statutes and declarations--is medicine for the soul. It is the mirror. What shall I see in its reflection. A mask? Or the real me, uncovered, bare, devoid of pretense?

Attending to the needs of the day--the urgent and the important--with a slow grace, one that acknowledges all is ultimately in God’s hands--he is my pilot--allows me to function with grace and ease, full of joy and peace. I am his passenger, along for the ride, the journey, the adventure of a lifetime, my life.

This is the stuff of life--the abundant life--promised by Jesus who said he came to give us ‘life, abundant life’. He came not to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved.

Take, drink, feast, delight. His yoke is easy, his burden is light. Learn of him. He is life. Abundant life, beautiful and free.

I know of no other way that is as wonderful. Is your life wonderful? Are you really living?

There is time and way to make change. Begin now. Make haste. Life is fleeting. Put the cup to your lips. Taste and see that the Lord is good, life is good. Change what you can; accept even embrace what you can’t change. This is your lot, you assignment, part of your unique curriculum. Don’t envy others their lot. For it was designed especially for them by their Creator. He doeth all things well.

Now, pass it on--share your joy, your love, your fun, your beauty and see how it grows and multiplies, becoming more than you ever dreamed or imagined. To life! To love! To joy! To beauty! To fun! And praise be to God from whom ALL blessings flow. Amen.

THE LEARNING CURVE

I'd say I'm in a rut. A rut, as described by an acquaintance, is a grave with the ends kicked out. I've been running up and down my current rut since the middle of September. A couple weeks ago I lost some of my vacation/Labor day gain by watching my fat intake but that was short lived. So, here I am, still running the rut.

In years past, that rut got really dark..it was a deep rut. But things have changed. Granted I'm in a rut, but I have hopes and intentions of climbing out.

Here's the thing. Even though I don't appear to be making any headway on the scale, as in moving closer to my goal, I have made major progress. I've come to this point in my thinking: quitting is no longer an option.

All my life, when I'd be unsuccessful in my weight loss efforts, I'd reach a really hard place and I'd quit---just give up, throw in the towel and eat, eat, eat. If the scale wasn't moving down I'd think " I'm not going to restrict my food intake--what's the point?". Likely, in my frustration and discouragement, I even ate food I didn't want--just because I "could". Having thrown off the diet I was free. Having no diet restricting me equals no restraint. And I exercised none.

The thing that is different now---that has changed ---is my thinking. When I quit the diet mentality and began to rethink my relationship with food I entered a new phase. In this phase quitting is not an option. There's nothing to quit.

Once I realized that my problem is eating too much food calorie wise I also discovered the solution. And that solution is to eat less food. Some days that is not so easy. Diets don't work. So, what does work? It's this: understanding that giving up is not an option.

In the past I was able to just quit. Now I can't. Why?

I have ever present in my head, these reminders: the miserable feeling I get when my gut is stuffed; the loathing and self recrimination that will follow; the clothing in my wardrobe that I won't be able to wear; the sadness that I can't "overcome" my problem, that once again I've given in; the loss of joy because I'm unable to enjoy the food I'm eating because fluttering around the edges of my thinking are the reminders personified-- whispering loudly the "you'll be sorry" message.

This host of thoughts, one might even call it the voice of reason, has become the restrainer. "It" speaks to me--and "it" doesn't go away. "It" hounds me so to speak. "It" won't get off my back, won't leave me alone. The diet, I could quit, toss in the trash. But the voice of reason? It presses me, presses in, forces me to face the consequences of my choices and it won't relent. Once reckoned, it can't be escaped.

It appears I'm connecting the dots ...that overeating leads to things I don't want. I always knew that--the knowledge was there in my head--but it had little effect. It was a case of knowing a thing, but it not mattering when it came right down to it. Because it was only the possibility, not the reality. The change now is that I'm able imagine, to feel, to experience the awfulness of those unwanted consequences without having done the deed.

So quitting is no longer an option. It's off the table--the burden of the result should I quit is more than I can bear. Therefore I trudge ahead, with the belief that as I persevere I will figure it out, and eventually I will progress downward on the scale.

BECAUSE I WON'T GO BACK "THERE" MY ONLY OPTION IS TO MOVE FORWARD

Why?

The past 3 days have been a bust. I've been eating past my calorie allotment--even though I'm not hungry. Arrrrrgh....Why do I do that? Honestly, I haven't got a clue. Which only serves to frustrate me and compel me to eat even more.

It seems when I "feel" out of control--which has been my feeling of late--I have no resolve. I feel helpless--a victim of whatever "it" is spinning me about, causing me to be discombobulated, rendering me unable to get any traction to stop "it" and get back on the path toward my goal. I feel like I'm in free fall, spinning about, totally without control. "It" carries me like a tidal wave toward looming disaster--to my way of thinking--where I will crash and burn. I need a parachute.

I awaken today, saying mentally, this is the day I attach, get some traction, put it in gear and head away from disaster making quick tracks. Can I prevail today over "it"? I don't know.

And until I can figure out what is really going on I am bound to repeat this behavior. Trying to stop "it" has been futile. How do you stop "it" when you don't even know what "it" is. For sure "it" is the enemy--one of many--that plagues me in my weight loss efforts. "It" has always been operative--that is why I've regained all the weight I've ever lost. Success comes to me, but it never stays. I couldn't maintain my success then, and I'm finding I'm having the same difficulty now.

And I'm well aware of what causes my downfall--eating more calories than my body needs to maintain its weight. But why now? Why back when?

I firmly believe it is something in my subconscious thinking driving me. My behavior is led by that thinking, my intention is set by that thinking. But what the heck am I thinking?!!!! Help! I need that parachute now--a tactic, a strategy, a clue..anything..something..*sigh*.

I refuse to throw in the towel, give up, at this point. I'm running out of years. The quitting tactic did not serve me well. So I've got to continue. But if I continue as I've always done I'm going to end up in the same place. I want to arrive in the land of "slimmed down", normal BMI...finally...and I want to stay in that country...live there--not just visit it.

Another Reason to Eat Multiple Small Meals

We smoothly said along with the "diet" and then vacation rolls around. Or a special event. Or the holidays.

Purposefully we decide to allow ourselves some indulgences during those special days, figuring we might gain a pound or two or three, but we are not concerned. We fully intend to go right back to the weight loss food level and shed any gain and continue in our weight loss efforts.

But we get home, full of good intentions to eat less food. But...it's *so* *hard*. Aside from the obvious, why?

Well, from my reading I understand that our bodies come to expect things physiologically. Meaning that if today I eat 1000 calories for lunch, tomorrow my body will be expecting 1000 calories once again for lunch. Chemical processes beyond my control will work to make that happen. Hence, the battle. My body "demanding" a 1000 calories while I'm desiring to limit my lunch to half or less that amount.

So--I'm thinking--wouldn't it be a smart strategy to eat several smaller "meals" over the course of a day? Instead of consuming 400-500 calories at one sitting for my breakfast, eat 200-250 calories, and then mid morning have another 200-250, getting my body used to not expecting more than 250 calories per meal. This eating several small meals has been touted as a method of keeping the metabolism stoked as well.

If this is true science, then it's no wonder we find it so hard to return to pre-vacation/holiday eating levels. We are fighting nature.

When I "vacate" my diet for special times I imagine I eat around 3000 calories per day. In the future instead of consuming it "1000 calories x 3 meals", I'm going to stretch those calories out and eat them in allotments of 500 calories per meal instead, hoping that once I return home it will be easier to reduce to the weight loss level.

In the meantime I'm testing this out at home. I'm continuing my 1600 calorie per day allowance but eating several smaller meals instead of 3 larger ones. I've noted that when following intuitive eating, and checking my calorie intake at the end of a day, I am intuitively eating right around 1600 calories a day. So maybe there is something to this idea of our body expecting a repeat from the previous pattern.

Make a List, Check It Twice

All too often my intentions don't become reality. I set my intentions but they aren't realized. I think I may have found a way to change that.

If you're like me, you make lists so you'll remember things at the grocery store. Or you'll make a list of errands you need to run. And what happens? If you remember to look at the list, you do what's on the list short of unforeseen circumstances.

So the other day I made a list of behaviors I wanted to change. But they were specific, not general. Compare: I will go to bed no later than 11:00 pm, versus I will get in bed earlier each night. See the difference?--11:00 p.m. is specific, "earlier" is general.

I had some behaviors that weren't serving me well and all my good intentions were too general to make a difference, so I thought on it a bit and came up with 4 specific things I could do to achieve the desired behavior. Imagine how surprised I was when I actually "did" my list!!

You may be thinking--why was she surprised?!! Didn't she know what she was doing? Well I did know, but when I made that list I imagined the outcome would again be failure--par for the course. My "spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." We all suffer with that.

But this time I got specific. Specifics are to the point. Generalities are not. Generalities leave to much room for free will to be exercised.

Remember when you were a kid? Mom told you what to do, you did it. Then you grew up--and there was no one around to dole out the cookies or tell you what to do. You opened the cookie bag--started eating--and stopped when either the bag was empty or your gut was full. You didn't make any conscious decision about how many cookies you'd eat. And that became the established pattern in your life.

That pretty much describes how I arrived at so many of the behaviors I practice. No forethought, no intention. And now I'm paying the price with my weight. And having to do some real work to change things.

So, I'm going to share my list, but let me give you some background to the behaviors that needed changing.

One was I've been staying up too late, falling asleep not having brushed my teeth (in case I wanted to eat--didn't want to re-brush!!), and then awaking, remembering that I needed to brush, getting up, doing so, and being wider awake than ever, unable to return to sleep.

Another problem area was the mornings. I work at home. But instead of getting up and getting dressed right away, I stay in my p.j.'s, not getting dressed until around 11:am each day.

Food behavior was part of the list too. I enjoy snacks between meals, but all too often it was pushing me over my desired calorie range. And I'd have to choose between having my snack and going over my range or skipping the snack, feeling deprived and forgoing the pleasure--not just the pleasure of eating, but the comfort that having tea and a snack gives in the middle of the afternoon.

A second food issue was at bedtime. I find it comforting to have a hot milk drink before bedtime and it helps me sleep. But again, the calorie thing was an issue.

These are issues I've wrangled with, in my head, for months now. Since my diet has taken a turn and the focus is on the mental mechanics and not just the food mechanics, I used a mental approach to change my behavior: I came up with a specific strategy, wrote it down and voila!! Success. D'oh!

Here's the list:

1. Get dressed at 1 hour after getting up.
2. Floss and brush prior to Last of the Summer Wine (a Brit-com I watch nightly).
3. Save calories for an afternoon treat of coffee/tea and cookies/muffin (215 K)
4. Save calories for hot milk beverage to drink with Last of the Summer Wine. (100K)

Understand: General goals are not good goals to have. For example, you may have a goal, a desire to be happy. That's too general. To achieve that goal you must be specific. What will make you happy, give you happiness? Figure that out, write it down, then do it. Take note though--the specifics must be things you yourself can can control. If they depend on another person or can be thwarted by another person, they are not good as goals.

For example, if you put down "have a husband" as a goal on your happy list, unless you meet someone and marry--which is dependent upon another person--you don't have the power to achieve that specific goal in and of yourself.

Many have a goal of having a happy marriage. That's not a good goal. A rotten spouse can prevent a happy marriage. A better goal for marriage is to be a good spouse--you can make that happen. But to have a good spouse? That's dependent upon another person who has free will and can make your life hell, should he/she desire--and for no good reason.


Try this list making thing if you are frustrated--and be specific. Now, while you're being specific, be realistic too. If you make the specifics difficult to achieve you're just setting yourself up for failure.

You can bet that making a list of specific achievable behaviors I can accomplish to help me attain my goal is something I plan to utilize in the future.